Devil on One Shoulder

There are days when you think, "she doesn't even seem sick" and then other days you can't even think of the word "cancer" without tearing up. If you listen to the thoughts that say, "she's gonna beat this", then you have to hear the thoughts that say, "she's gone". The answer to this is to stop listening. The past 6 weeks have been a real test of thought management. I now refuse to let my mind wander. Period.

Since the diagnoses I have been flooded with phone calls, emails, texts, and FB friend requests. this blog is my response to that. I can't answer everything or add even the smallest jobs to my current 'to-do' list. I just can't tell the 'story' one more time. I have been touched by the thoughtfulness and generosity of those around us and can't thank those people enough who went out of their way to help us and Lizzie in ways that really matter.

So far she is tolerating chemo well. She is a little trooper and it's sad how normal it all seems to be for them after such a short time. I watcher her maneuver her IV line today with careless ease and swallowing pills whole like it was nothing.

On Monday we had a family day. We went to a farm with a harvest-y thing going on and saw the animals, picked a pumpkin, did the maze and played in the giant pile of hay. It was a beautiful day on a farm in the hills surrounded by my husband and children. I think I will look back on that day as one of the happiest of my life.